Monday, August 16, 2004
Well...let's just say that I hope I did "ok" in the course...eek...that exam was hard. I guessed on toooo many questions.
Anyway..I'm exhausted. I don't even know what I want to do with myself for the rest of the night. I hate that...I have to get up at 7am tomorrow to make work in time...maybe 6:45, really, and so knowing I only have so many hours of the night left, I find myself wasting the entire time trying to decide how I want to spend it! arhg.
Anyway, after the exam I met up with HWMNBN and he coerced me into an icecream from that icecream truck-but he paid so I'm not complaining...really..., somehow...*grumble* and then we walked up to Bloor...almost there, I realized I had forgotten to take my library stuff back..doh! Oh well...late charges for me..I made us stop at the Remydl ...Remadyl....what the hell...what IS that store called! The music store with sheet music and instruments!!....anyway, I browsed through the french horn and alto sax section and almsot dropped money on some technique books and pieces..I really need an audition piece for my sax..and some proper books for my horn...but..not yet...I am still not spending a dime until everything is paid off and I have money saved. Anyway...then he made us stop at mcfatty's so he could get something. I hate mcdonalds so much. Then we took a bus to yonge and eglinton instead...weird...I didn't know a bus went there, hehe. It was a longer drive but scenic, at any rate! Chatted for a bit and then I went and bought puppy's dog food from the PJ's pet centre and even got him a "chewie bone" (rawhide bone)...he knows that word better than anything. Never say it around him, you'll get his hopes up...He was incredibly pleased when I asked him if he wanted a chewie bone and then proceeded to give it to him. I am damned tired. I have honestly done nothing since I got home but had a light supper and ......yeah...I need to practice my highland dancing/work out.....the practice is a hard workout...so that will be my work out....*looks at the time* ughhh....I don't want to...but I agreed to have a highland dance lesson tomorrow after work since I missed friday's..booo.....so tomorrow I have to work 8:45-1 and then make my way over to cabbage town by 2:30 for a lesson. I feel like such a jerk because I didn't practice...but erm, I was rather busy with my exam and such...Oh well.least now that my exam is over, I'M FREEEE!! mostly!! I have time to work like mad on the work I am doing for that prof, and write my book and read and stuff!!
On a deeper note...because I know this is the good stuff everyone wants when they lurk in blogs....I'm feeling so crazy inside. I feel like I am looking for something...or that maybe what I want is staring right at me right now...for years...and I never realized...:s....but if it is...I dunno...do I want to venture there....but maybe it's just that I'm looking for something. I'm picky...I'm finicky...we all know it, or maybe you don't, but now you do. I feel like I walk around with a check-list in my hands. I find myself analyzing people. Bad habit. I blame taking a course on evolutionary biology and ecology.... I want something but I don't know if it exists...or...I know what I want is there but can I have it and is it what I want and..all of that....just... whimsical thoughts floating about in my head ....or maybe I am happy where I stand....but...I don't know what level of happiness I am supposed to have to indicate whether i should stay put or drift about. How high am I setting the bar and how the hell am I supposed to know.
I don't want to walk the long journey again unless I am satisfied and sure. I just finished a long journey...how can I be starting another one already. Something tells me that this isn't the time for it. But I dunno, you know? I'd have to be sold on it. And there is some stuff that I'm just not buying....again...am I setting bar too high? or is my mind looking elsewhere..I don't know...you know?...
...Okay you don't know..and my cryptic ramblings are probably confusing you...
right..think I'll take the dog out and go to bed.
Work tomorrow.
...*shudders*
Anyway..I'm exhausted. I don't even know what I want to do with myself for the rest of the night. I hate that...I have to get up at 7am tomorrow to make work in time...maybe 6:45, really, and so knowing I only have so many hours of the night left, I find myself wasting the entire time trying to decide how I want to spend it! arhg.
Anyway, after the exam I met up with HWMNBN and he coerced me into an icecream from that icecream truck-but he paid so I'm not complaining...really..., somehow...*grumble* and then we walked up to Bloor...almost there, I realized I had forgotten to take my library stuff back..doh! Oh well...late charges for me..I made us stop at the Remydl ...Remadyl....what the hell...what IS that store called! The music store with sheet music and instruments!!....anyway, I browsed through the french horn and alto sax section and almsot dropped money on some technique books and pieces..I really need an audition piece for my sax..and some proper books for my horn...but..not yet...I am still not spending a dime until everything is paid off and I have money saved. Anyway...then he made us stop at mcfatty's so he could get something. I hate mcdonalds so much. Then we took a bus to yonge and eglinton instead...weird...I didn't know a bus went there, hehe. It was a longer drive but scenic, at any rate! Chatted for a bit and then I went and bought puppy's dog food from the PJ's pet centre and even got him a "chewie bone" (rawhide bone)...he knows that word better than anything. Never say it around him, you'll get his hopes up...He was incredibly pleased when I asked him if he wanted a chewie bone and then proceeded to give it to him. I am damned tired. I have honestly done nothing since I got home but had a light supper and ......yeah...I need to practice my highland dancing/work out.....the practice is a hard workout...so that will be my work out....*looks at the time* ughhh....I don't want to...but I agreed to have a highland dance lesson tomorrow after work since I missed friday's..booo.....so tomorrow I have to work 8:45-1 and then make my way over to cabbage town by 2:30 for a lesson. I feel like such a jerk because I didn't practice...but erm, I was rather busy with my exam and such...Oh well.least now that my exam is over, I'M FREEEE!! mostly!! I have time to work like mad on the work I am doing for that prof, and write my book and read and stuff!!
On a deeper note...because I know this is the good stuff everyone wants when they lurk in blogs....I'm feeling so crazy inside. I feel like I am looking for something...or that maybe what I want is staring right at me right now...for years...and I never realized...:s....but if it is...I dunno...do I want to venture there....but maybe it's just that I'm looking for something. I'm picky...I'm finicky...we all know it, or maybe you don't, but now you do. I feel like I walk around with a check-list in my hands. I find myself analyzing people. Bad habit. I blame taking a course on evolutionary biology and ecology.... I want something but I don't know if it exists...or...I know what I want is there but can I have it and is it what I want and..all of that....just... whimsical thoughts floating about in my head ....or maybe I am happy where I stand....but...I don't know what level of happiness I am supposed to have to indicate whether i should stay put or drift about. How high am I setting the bar and how the hell am I supposed to know.
I don't want to walk the long journey again unless I am satisfied and sure. I just finished a long journey...how can I be starting another one already. Something tells me that this isn't the time for it. But I dunno, you know? I'd have to be sold on it. And there is some stuff that I'm just not buying....again...am I setting bar too high? or is my mind looking elsewhere..I don't know...you know?...
...Okay you don't know..and my cryptic ramblings are probably confusing you...
right..think I'll take the dog out and go to bed.
Work tomorrow.
...*shudders*
